Today I was talking to someone at work, and our friend and colleague S.H. came up in the conversation. It so happens that S.H. walks really, really fast. He pretty much powerwalks everywhere he goes. And I don't know what prompted me, but I found myself spontaneously saying "He charges along like he's got two angry horses inside of him".
Interesting. I kept thinking about that sentence, and eventually it dawned on me that it's not just a single, static phrase but a general descriptive formula with animals and locations as the variable terms. Consider the following applications:
"She couldn't have been more distracted if she had a pair of squirrels bickering under her hat";
"He snores like he's channeling two drunk elephants";
"She hustled and bustled like she'd got a pair of chihuahuas on diet pills inside of her"
And so on.
#2: "HE LOOKS LIKE A HAIRY BOULDER NOW"
I was talking to R., another colleague, and a certain *famous actor's name came up. This man is a veteran actor who is almost as well known around Hollywood for his strong political convictions and activist spirit as for his acting prowess. Not to take anything away from his talent, as he is a wonderful actor, but I'm certain his very solid, formidable appearance has been a valuable asset to him in his career. And since he's also been an actor longer than many of us have been alive, I found myself saying "He looks like a hairy boulder now".
*O.K., you've twisted my arm, it's Ed Asner
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